1)The man who killed a Weslyan student recently may be charged with a hate crime due to racist journal entries. Um, correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t murder itself pretty hateful? Is there a special section of prison for people who commit a misdemeanor or two en route to a felony?
“Hey MadDog, be careful of the new guy in cell block 6…”
“Why is that, Spike?
“Well, he robbed a bank.”
“ So what?”
“After he robbed the bank, he jaywalked on his way to the getaway car; not only that, but his getaway driver made an illegal right turn on red!”
“Wow, he’s hard core. Thanks for the warning!”
2)The Coast Guard graduation is today, and apparently the speaker is Johnette Napolitano, Secretary of Homeland Security. Can anyone tell me why the lead singer and bassist for Concrete Blonde is acting as Secretary of Homeland Secu
rity? Was there no one else more qualified? I’m pretty sure I’d be better for the job, as I’ve put up several picket fences, and once fired my nephew’s 0.22 rifle, hitting a soda can dead center from 50 yards. Matter of fact, I shot that can without shooting anyone in the face, so I might make a pretty solid Vice President too…
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